Social Engineering Telephone Scammers
It all started one particularly frustrating evening when my phone rang for the fifth time that day. I picked it up, already knowing the script I’d hear on the other end: “Congratulations! You’ve won a free cruise...” or “This is the IRS, and you owe back taxes...” The scammers seemed to have my number on speed dial.
The interruptions were relentless, and no amount of blocking numbers seemed to help. One evening, after another call about an “urgent car warranty issue,” I decided I’d had enough. If I couldn’t stop them, maybe I could confuse them.
My lightbulb moment came while staring at a half-empty box of Domino’s Pizza on my kitchen counter. What if my phone number wasn’t associated with me at all? What if it belonged to someone… or something… else entirely?
The next time a scammer called, I took a deep breath, put on my best customer service voice, and answered, “Thank you for calling Domino’s Pizza! Would you like to place an order?” There was a pause on the line, followed by a confused, “Uh… what?” I repeated myself cheerily. “This is Domino’s Pizza! Would you like to try our two-for-one special today?”
The scammer stammered a bit before hanging up. I grinned.
From then on, every scam call was an opportunity to refine my act. I memorized menu items and started throwing in phrases like, “Can I get your address for delivery?” or “Our pepperoni pizza is a customer favorite!” If they persisted with their script, I’d politely inform them, “I’m sorry, we don’t accept payments for cruises, but we do have a great garlic bread deal.”
One scammer even tried to argue, insisting they were calling about a government grant. “Oh, I’m so sorry,” I replied earnestly. “But we don’t handle grants here. Could I interest you in a side of cheesy bread with your pizza?”
The beauty of the prank was in its simplicity. Most scammers didn’t have the patience to argue with a “pizza place,” and the calls started to dwindle. A few even asked, “Is this really Domino’s?” to which I’d reply, “Of course! You’ve reached our hotline. What can I get started for you today?”
After a couple of weeks, the calls stopped entirely. It seemed my number had been blacklisted… by the scammers. Success!
Not only did I reclaim my peace and quiet, but I also got the satisfaction of turning an annoyance into a comedic routine. So, the next time you’re plagued by relentless scam calls, consider becoming the world’s least helpful pizza place. It’s surprisingly effective.